A Future to Contemplate

So I've been doing a lot of thinking over the last few weeks. Most having to do with what I will be doing after this year at UO. Thoughts concerning where God is going to take me... Re-interning again has been something that I've been really praying about as I've been asked to consider doing. My other possible scenario is to return back to Portland and pursuing a career.

It's been a tough decision. On one end I want to allow God to lead me and be able to follow Him faithfully. On the other end there is the aspect of wanting to have some sort of control of what is going on in my life. There is a certain level of comfort in having some sort of power to steer your own life (financially, socially, etc). At the end of the day, I ended up having to ask myself... "Am I being faithful to God in the decision that I end up making?"

Despite not having any clear cut sign in deciding to intern again that I would be able to say without a doubt that this is what God wants me to do; there hasn't been anything that would oppose the decision other then options that when I look at them, they could be categorized as selfish ambitions. Now I stand, knocking on the door. Should God want me to enter another year I believe that he will clear a path for me to follow on and will provide all that I need. At this point I'm not quite ready to fully announce my definite plans after this internship just yet. I want to follow up on a few things and fully understand the situation before I make the decision, which I feel will be coming soon in this next week.